Ban the Bible

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One person walked out. I succeeded.

After the April 21st shooting at Columbine High School in Colorado, legislators finally took notice. Knee-jerk legislation abounded because never before in America's history had so many middle-class, God-fearing, porcelain children met a brutal demise in one fell swoop.

Something has to be done to protect the children, no matter how reactionary. Heading the pack is Henry Hyde.

Hyde, the chairman of the House Committee on the Judiciary, recently announced a bill titled the "Children's Defense Act of 1999." At first, I thought this bill would protect children from their incompetent, irresponsible parents, but the bill would actually prohibit any establishment – from libraries to video stores to bookstores – from selling, renting, or loaning violent and sexual material to minors.

The no-no's on Hyde's list include: acts of masturbation, homosexuality, and sexual intercourse; physical contact with a person's clothed or unclothed genitals, buttocks, or breasts; rape; acts of mutilation upon the human body; and, sadistic or masochistic activity.

Many view this legislation as an affront to the First Amendment. Some school districts, at the behest of parents, have already banned such book as The Diary of Anne Frank, To Kill A Mockingbird, The Color Purple, and Huckleberry Finn.

Even though Hyde's proposal makes allowances for violent and sexually explicit that has "socially redeeming value" for minors, who decides what is socially redeeming? This legislation could still aid in the quest to ban "offensive" books, right?

Well, to hell with the naysayers. I applaud Hyde's effort. We need to protect America's children, regardless of the cost to the freedom we hold so dear. I view this as the perfect time to take this legislation to its natural extreme and rid this fine, moral nation of a book that has polluted the minds of American children for generations.

No book, be it American Psycho or Lady Chatterly's Lover, has depicted such extreme acts of violence and sexual relations as this book has. But, this book is widely accepted and cherished.

While it costs $7 to rent a pornographic movie in a motel, this book is available in every room – in an unlocked drawer, where innocent children can easily find it, and have their impressionable minds corrupted and their fragile lives ruined.

From an early age, most Americans are exposed to this book in their homes, schools, and place of worship. Special diluted versions of this book have been created specifically for children and lazy adults because the unadulterated version is grotesque and perverse. If any person claiming that this book belongs in the bedroom of every child and on the desk of every teacher took the time to read the content, his opinion might change.

This book is dark, dreary, and morbid. This book encourages people to hang pictures of a nearly nude, bloodied man engaged in a masochistic activity – an obvious sexual fetish – and to wear his broken body around their necks. This book discusses, and sometimes, glorifies: adultery, incest, rape, mutilation, cannibalism, and murder.

(Genesis 19:4-8 ) "And Lot went up to Zoar," reads a passage, "and stayed in the mountains, and his two daughters with him.... Then the firstborn said to the younger, 'Our father is old, and there is not a man on earth to come in to us after the manner of the earth. Come, let us make our father drink wine, and let us lie with him, that we may preserve our family through our father.' Thus both the daughters of Lot were with child by their father."

Two daughters conspire to have sex with their father. Here we have rape, deceit, incest, and illegitimate pregnancy. Do we want our children exposed to this debauchery? According to the organization Prevent Child Abuse America, at least 20% of American women experienced some form of sexual abuse as children. What kind of message is this book sending to girls? That sexual abuse is okay? That incest is acceptable?

And, yet, it is held up as a moral guide.

What of the passage that reads, "(II Kings 6:28,29) And the king said unto her, What aileth thee? And she answered, This woman said unto me, Give thy son, that we may eat him to day, and we will eat my son to morrow. So we boiled my son, and did eat him: and I said unto her on the next day, Give thy son,that we may eat him: and she hath hid her son."

What kind of sick imagery does that put into the minds of children? The consumption of one's young? Why, even in Hansel and Gretel, the two children get away before the witch can eat them. Here, cannibalism and child murder are not depicted in a negative light.

In a 1993 national survey conducted by Metropolitan Life, 55 percent of teachers and 60 percent of law enforcement officials believed that violence in the mass media is a "major" factor contributing to violence in the schools.

But, still, this book remains an integral part of America's culture and history.

America's children are suffering. Our children are crying out for help. They are in danger. If we are to save them, if we are to rescue them from this moral turpitude, there is only one thing we can do: ban this book; ban the Bible. Don't you care enough about the children to do that?

Providing jack-off material for white misogynists since 1997.

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